Hi Cristian,

I'm sorry things are so hard. I know what that's like.

I can't tell you what to do, but I can tell you this: it took me a long time to find the best treatment for me -- and things still require tweaking. Moreover, it's unlikely that any one thing will work on its own for you. You likely need a combination of approaches like therapy and medication together. And remember, doing what you have always done will give you what you've always gotten. You can't change your brain on your own.

One thing I can say is, don't give up. Things can get better.

-- Natasha Tracy

Hi Sherry,

I'm so sorry about how hard it is. I know what it's like to appear "fine" but be anything but. I also know how hard it is to ask for help.

I think when you're asking for support, the best thing to do is to think about what you want to say ahead of time and think, specifically, about how to explain what you're going through. You can then think about how to express yourself while not overly concerning the other person. (Keep in mind some concern is normal and unavoidable.)

For example, maybe you want to talk about being depressed. You might say something like, "I feel like everything is grey. Food tastes like sawdust. I feel like I'm never going to get better. I don't know what to do."

All those things are normal and okay. You might want to further express something like this, though, "I know my brain is lying to me about never getting better, but it feels very real."

The second part is important because it helps the other person put what you're saying into perspective.

Other people don't know what it's like to be in your brain, so try to explain it to them and explain how concerned they actually should be.

Finally, if you can't do the above, I understand. It's awful to have to take care of the other person while asking for help for yourself. That doesn't mean you still should ask, though. If they're concerned, then they're concerned, and that's okay.

-- Natasha Tracy

Hi Amy,

Thank you so much for reaching out to share this part of your story. From one twin to another, I am deeply sorry for the loss of your sister, and I can certainly understand the frustration, discomfort, and insecurities of feeling like your bodies were under constant scrutiny and comparison. I appreciate your vulnerability and willingness to share your insights and experience.

I lost my mum a few years back, and she lived a life full of ups and downs. As a child I never wanted myself to suffer the way she did. But as I've gotten older, the illness seems to be getting worse. I went from a relatively successful student at university, on the path to making something out of my life, to then being hospitalised and years later still struggling to fix myself.

I now live a very depressed life, which is very isolating. I understand the feeling of not wanting to die, but also getting very worn out from living.

One day I want to seek help for myself, and the rest of the time I think it would be best to just soldier on alone.

I hate being such a disappointment to people, whether it's friends, family, or even the rare relationships I encounter.

I've tried medication in the past, I've tried counselling and support groups, I now think that nothing will help, especially not even my own ability to help myself.

If only you could just take whatever is wrong out of my head, as I really hate to think things are just going to get worse until life decides it's time for me to pass.

Hi Natasha,
I appreciate your transparency and step by step ideas to survive as a single person.. Even though I suffer from Bipolar 1, I find that either end of the polar spectrum creates chaos in my life as well as friends and family. These are the more full blown manic times, where literally everyone who cares about me are dealing with hospitalization emergencies. While well , they assume everything is fine. Now is the deep depression where even leaving my house or getting out of bed are really hard. I am overwhelmed and my house is a mess. I do not communicate my depression to anyone but my therapist because I don’t want to make them worry. I’m worried myself because of the unpredictability of this disease.. I am too sad to cry and I’m practically having a panic attack thinking about going to work tomorrow. At any moment I could snap at one of my unlikable colleagues. Even though I need a paycheck, I’m also fully capable of quitting if anyone crosses me. The biggest frustration is that no one seems to understand. I appear normal on the outsides but inside, it can really suck. I’m going to listen to your podcasts and hopefully, you will cover more specifics on how to elicit support without causing panic…and who wants to be appointed this unpleasant job.